A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a whiskey and … cola.”
Why the big pause? asks the bartender. The bear shrugged. “I’m not sure; I was born with them.”??
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
He just needed a “little space.”
What does a nosy pepper do?
Gets jalapeño business!
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
“Brrrroooom, brrroooom.”
How do celebrities stay cool?
“They have many fans.”
What do you call a dinosaur that doesn’t take a bath?
“A stink -o -Saurus”
How do you measure a snake?
In inches—they don’t have feet.
??
Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends?
Well, honestly, he’s a real pain in the neck.
??
Why are frogs always so happy?
They eat whatever bugs them.
??
why didn’t the chicken cross the road?
because there was a KFC on the other side.??
And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth, and you will receive eternal life.
But John came fifth and won a toaster.
☠️☠️
Where do beef burgers go to dance?
The meatball
My friend thinks he is brilliant. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.???
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
“HeHe”
Tell us your favorite jokes in the comments? We would love to post them with your name.
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